Hope Lutheran Church, Fargo, ND - Pastor Mark Vitalis Hoffman - 4/96

Should a Wife Be Submissive?

A Study of 1 Peter 3.1-7

For Openers:

• Give an example from your youth of how you were either rebellious or submissive?
• What is something you really hate sharing with someone else?
• The biggest surprise I experienced in marriage is that...

For Your Information:

Read 1 Peter 2.11-12

Note how this provides the background for the whole section in 2.11-4.19 on Christian responsibilities in time of suffering.

Read 1 Peter 3.1-7

The ancient world was a highly patriarchal society where women were indeed regarded as the "weaker sex" (see verse 7 - on such weakness, though, read 1 Corinthians 1.26-29!). Note that this passage envisions a situation where there are women who have become Christians whose husbands have not. (A similar situation is described in 1 Corinthians 7.12-16.) It is assumed in 3.7 that the husbands all have Christian wives. The presence in the early Christian church of so many slaves and women, people low on the social scale, is an indication that life among Christians was found to be a liberating experience that acknowledged greater equality than the prevailing non-Christian culture.

The instructions about husbands and wives given in 3.1-7 are representative of "Household Rules" which were common in 1 Peter's time and culture. For more on husbands and wives, read Ephesians 5.21-33; Colossians 3.18-19; and Titus 2.3-5. For examples of how non-Christian Jews and Greeks expressed similar thoughts, see the excerpts on the back page of this handout.

• 3.1 and 7 - Note that both the section addressed to wives and the one to husbands begins with, "In the same way..." This means that the advice to both husbands and wives is like the advice to slaves given in 2.18-25. Ultimately, all the advice refers back to 2.16 where all Christians are identified as being slaves of God.
• 3.1 and 5 - The Greek word translated by "accept the authority of" is hypotasso. It carries the sense of "be subordinate to" or "be subject to." The outward display of such subordination is "obedience" (hypakouo) as exhibited by Sarah in verse 6. Part of the background for the instruction about a wife's subordination is Genesis 3.16. Read this passage but note that the subordination of Eve is pronounced as punishment for sin.
• 3.3-4 - Also read 1 Timothy 2.9-10.
• 3.5 - The word for adorn is kosmeo from which comes the English word "cosmetic."
• 3.5-6 - Read Genesis 18.1-15 for more information on the relationship between Sarah and Abraham.

For Your Consideration:

1. How is the Bible like or unlike the following? What difference does your initial understanding of the Bible make in how you interpret it?
   • History textbook
   • Songbook
   • Law book
   • Romance novel
   • Mystery novel
   • (Auto)Biography
   • Reader's Digest
   • Owner's manual
   • Book of poetry
   • Philosophy textbook
   • TV Guide
   • Science textbook
   • Newspaper
   • Script for a play
   • Sermon
2. What other factors are involved in your interpretation of the Bible? What texts are more important for you: Old or New Testament? Words of Jesus or those of Paul? How do your own reasoning and experiences influence your understanding of Scripture? What is the role of the Church and the Christian tradition?
3. 3.1 - What does it mean for a wife to "accept the authority" of one's husband or to "be subject to" or "be submissive to" him? What are some examples of how this could work out well in a marriage relationship? What are the problems with it?
4. 3.1-7 - Is this description of how women are to be submissive to the authority of their husbands given as advice specific to that time and community or as a perpetual command? Is it Christian counsel given in light of the culture of that time or is it a description of how culture ought always to be and how women are to act within it? Note that the goal given in verse 1 why women are to act in the specified way is an evangelistic one: to win converts to Christ. If this goal remains our foremost consideration, how ought women (and men) act today in our culture?
5. 3.1-7 - Does this passage indicate that women should remain submissive even in a relationship where the husband is abusive? What advice would you give to a woman whose husband was abusive?
6. How do you reconcile verses 1-2 with verse 8 or 1 Peter 4.8? Read again Ephesians 5.21 and 22 and 33. Explain how these passages are relevant. How do passages like 1 Corinthians 7.3-4 and Galatians 3.28 fit into the picture?
7. 3.3-4 - How do you deal with this passage which says that women ought not to braid their hair or wear gold ornaments or fine clothing? Do the Amish women in their plain dressing have it right? What is really at issue in the warning against women outwardly adorning themselves? How does that compare with the issues women face today? How does the way we dress make a social statement? A religious statement?
8. 3.7 - How does a relationship with a spouse affect one's prayers to God?
9. What would the relationship of a husband and wife be like in an ideal marriage where sin was not a factor?

For Later:

• What is something you could do for your spouse to show love and respect? Do it!
• Do you think that you and your spouse could provide support and worthwhile advice to a newly married couple? Let one of your pastors know if you would be willing to serve as mentors.
• Read 1 Corinthians 13 and use it as the basis for prayer with your spouse.

What other people were saying about husbands and wives in the first century:

Plutarch (a late first century Greek biographer and essayist), Moralia, "Advice to Bride and Groom"

• Whenever two notes are sounded in accord the tune is carried by the bass; and in like manner every activity in a virtuous household is carried on by both parties in agreement, but discloses the husband's leadership and preferences. (139D)
• A wife ought not to make friends of her own but to enjoy her husband's friends in common with him. The gods are the first and most important friends. Wherefore it is becoming for a wife to worship and to know only the gods that her husband believes in, and to shut the front door tight upon all strange rituals and outlandish superstitions. (140D)
• A woman ought to do her talking either to her husband or through her husband, and she should not feel aggrieved if, like the flute-player, she makes a more impressive sound through a tongue not her own. (142D)
• If women subordinate themselves to their husbands, they are commended, but if they want to have control, they cut a sorrier figure than the subjects of their control. And control ought to be exercised by the man over the woman, not as the owner has control of a piece of property, but, as the soul controls the body, by entering into her feelings and being knit to her through goodwill. As, therefore, it is possible to exercise care over the body without being a slave to its pleasures and desires, so it is possible to govern a wife, and at the same time to delight and gratify her.

Josephus (a first century Jewish historian and apologist), Against Apion 2.201

• The woman, says the Law, is in all things inferior to the man. [Genesis 3.16] Let her accordingly be submissive, not for her humiliation, but that she may be directed; for the authority has been given by God to the man.

Further Study Tools on 1 Peter 3

Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Permission requests? Let me know: orders@crossmarks.com

Key Texts Used in this Study (NRSV)

1 Peter 2:11 Beloved, I urge you as aliens and exiles to abstain from the desires of the flesh that wage war against the soul. 12 Conduct yourselves honorably among the Gentiles, so that, though they malign you as evildoers, they may see your honorable deeds and glorify God when he comes to judge.Return to Bible Study

1 Peter 3:1 Wives, in the same way, accept the authority of your husbands, so that, even if some of them do not obey the word, they may be won over without a word by their wives' conduct, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Do not adorn yourselves outwardly by braiding your hair, and by wearing gold ornaments or fine clothing; 4 rather, let your adornment be the inner self with the lasting beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in God's sight. 5 It was in this way long ago that the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves by accepting the authority of their husbands. 6 Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him lord. You have become her daughters as long as you do what is good and never let fears alarm you. 7 Husbands, in the same way, show consideration for your wives in your life together, paying honor to the woman as the weaker sex, since they too are also heirs of the gracious gift of life--so that nothing may hinder your prayers. Return to Bible Study